Skeleton with Intact Wings

So...how did everything but the wings deteriorate? Yes, the red part is a foot.

AKA/BKA

At Andrew Jackson Middle School, ca. 1982-83, in Suitland, MD, kids would adopt an AKA or BKA. For example, Ainisha might go by Smurfette. You would see, "Ainisha AKA Smurfette." But this graffiti suggests that the art form has evolved. Clearly, one must develop at least two AKA/BKAs....

Preserved Meat Boy

If you know my son Max, you know that he loves breakfast meat. Whilst eating lunch, he pulled this out of his pocket. And he tasted it. "Max, what is that?" "A sausage log casing!"

The Long Arm of Fashion

Old Navy, Hyattsville, MD

Thick & Rough (Supermarket Gleanings)

Courtesy of R. Roach!

Strawberry Crush Pound Cake! (Supermarket Gleanings)

Mere words cannot describe the horror I felt upon finding this entire box of Strawberry Crush pound cake. Orange and Grape Crush pound cakes were in boxes next to this. Wow.

WAM Is Hard

I play violin. Okay, Mozart isn't Paganini, but geeeez. When you have all those micronotes, you've got trouble.

The Best Way To Exit A Public Restroom Stall...

...is with a roundhouse kick.

Shoveling Snow Causes Jaundice

My hand turned a distinct shade of yellow after shoveling snow. I should stop shoveling snow. Or wearing yellow-dyed leather work gloves.

Walk Softly...And Carry A Big Yoga Mat

Uh...hello! You picked the one night a week on which three--THREE--scouts groups meet. Mofackos.

Snod

With a name like Snodgrass, one must be prepared for endless teasing at the hands of school chums. I've already prepared my 10-year-old son. It starts with, "Snodgrass?! Ha!" It morphs to "SnoTgrass," and ends with "SnoT-Ass." The entire devolution takes mere moments. Today I actually laughed at the name my colleague wrote on some paperwork: "Snod." Just Snod.

Lunch, Now Brought To You In Cellophane

I suppose somebody in the lunch room just didn't want his ramen noodles flavored today. He thoughtfully left the flavor packet and freeze-dried, nutritionally void vegetables.

This Door Serviced By TACO

This door is at my church. It opens and closes thanks to Taco.*

*Presumably not affiliated with Taco of "Puttin' on the Ritz" fame.

Crazy Pepsi Man

This hustler knows how to hawk his wares. This day he was selling $4 hot chocolate. $4!!! I could buy 60 packs of Swiss Miss at Costco for that. The best thing about Crazy Pepsi Man is his homemade Pepsi logo on his headband. This was taken at Chevy Chase Bank FSB (a Division of Capital One) Field at Byrd Stadium, but Crazy Pepsi Man works RFK Stadium, too. I've seen him.