Pin•Head

Call it a gift. Call it a curse. My head's circumference is small. I can wear almost any hat except one for infants. Thus...

Ikea, College Park, MD

"Honey, I'm goin' prospectin'."

Dodge pick-up truck, College Park, MD

Bald = Cold

I cut my hair very short. I do it myself. In the winter, it makes me cold. So I wear a hat in the office. Beats wing-tips.

Milk...Jumbo-Sized

My kids drink enough milk (skim!) to merit a cow in the back yard. The new milk department at Costco should suffice.

Barbie & Your Daughter: Now At McDonald's!

Happy Meal text:
"Strut! Sway! Sashay!"

Bread 'N' Butter As Viking Ship

My Adopted God-Daughter

Good blackmail material for her teen years.

Please Translate

• Hairdressing: Creation contain fog's oxygen, moisten the skin
• Delightfully fresh: Return to return the nature, decontamination air
• Add wet: Change the water into fog, wetness air
• Modifier: The indoors decorates, vogue decoration

Mystery product, Arundel Mills Mall

French-Milled Soap

Like you, I've got at least 37 little bars of hotel soap in my bathroom closet. They always say, "French-Milled Soap." What's so special about that? Hmm. Sorry for the fuzziness.

Safe Sword!

I'm a bit embarrassed to admit that my best friend Stanley and I would wail on each other in Lot 4 at the University of Maryland using hollow plastic swords from a dollar store. That was when we were in our early twenties. Clearly, foam is the new hollow plastic. They're safe! They're fun! They're carried by Clone Troopers ™ (NOT)!

What the...?!

I don't even have a photo for this entry. Last night while scanning the vast array of cable TV channels at my disposal, the only thing worthy of mentioning was..."Andrew Lessman Your Vitamins Anniversary [sic]". Huh?

cakelove

I showed myself some luv last night. cakelove. Snickers-inspired cake. It was good, but not $7.50 good. That's PER SLICE.

IHOP Panic Button

IHOP has a panic button. They need one for slow service.
College Park, MD